The call I've been waiting for.

I got a call from the surgons office this morning. I told her I was just about to call her and she said "Oh?" I told her I was going to let her know that Lifeline sleep center faxed over the information they needed for my CPAP, and I also got all of the bloodwork (11 viles!!) done they needed this morning. She said that was very good, and asked me if I still was using my nuva ring. (I read in my booklet that I was given you are to stop birth control 1 month before surgery, but no one told me when to stop since I didnt know how long til I heard something). I told her yes and she told me to stop using it now, then she kind of mumbled something to herself, like counting (I guess counting days until the hormones would be clear of my body?). She said "Well it looks like you've been approved so we will be calling you later this week with your surgery date". I was so excited, and she sounded happy for me and told me she knew I was waiting and anxious. I thanked her and started texting and calling people.

I should be so happy and preparing, but instead I feel almost crushed inside right now. The person who I thought would be my biggest supporter is turning out to be my worst enemy right now. My husband, the one who vowed to be there for better or worse, for sickness and in health. I found out through a mutual friend that he's more concerned about being able to take his car to Philly in March rather then working out how long he will be off to take care of his wife, from her major surgery.

He keeps telling me he's not sure how long he can take off work (he has 2 weeks vacation and 3 personal days), and that he'll have his mom come over and help. I dont want his mother, I want my husband. I really wish he would have come to the seminar with him. Maybe he'd understand that for almost 2 weeks I will not be able to leave the couch, and that for the first few weeks I will be vomiting all of the time, and I cannot lift anything (like our son) for a few weeks. He thinks its like having a baby, you take a few days off, then everything is great. (Though us mothers know its not like that at ALL).

I dont even know what to say. I feel like I've lost any support I had (I know you all care, but I know I cant expect my internet friends to take care of me LOL).

I dont want to talk to him right now. I'm too hurt and angry, and I feel very unloved.

I will pray. I will pray my husband realizes what he's doing. I'll pray that he'll change after he sees this isnt some easy surgery. This is life changing.